Fresh out of charm, ambush love --
use the element of surprise
to foster her affection. Hide behind
maroon curtains, step out
with gifts -- fish gills, folded,
black widow tequila, elfers on ice.
Or, text a prize -- dogsled trek,
remote hot springs, camping overnight,
with you, alone, chance to unwind.
Send photos of scorpions mating --
subtle proof males suffer, bleed, die.
Keep it pure -- no games, no lies.
Never permit her a long look
into your molten red eyes.